Here we shall continue addressing the common remarks.

“That’s not healthy! Why can’t you just be healthy!”

Whoever’s throwing these is probably coming from either one of these confirmation-biased camps:

They’re pedestrian epidemiologists. They’re already married to the statistical nod ~ of general doctors, lipid hypothesis and the Big Four (4) ~ Pharma, Government, Food and Banks.
They’re insecure. They are trying to bring down others to-their-level, so they feel better. In other words ~ Tall Poppy Syndrome.

This will not be easily dealt with just a short one sentence or exit statement. Not easy ~ because they come from everywhere. Families, relatives, colleagues and/or friends whom you trust.

First and foremost, prepare a polite counter. But with an end-question in mind ~ “what-about-you?”.

“Healthy or not Healthy I don’t care. I learn it. I absorb it and I keep it.”

“What about you? What makes you ~ “you”?”

If they do not respond or that they concede, then consider the conversation finished. Good. You’ve won. Do not continue. Try changing the subject (if possible).

If they’re still chatterbox, it’s time to counter with leading and then probing ~ questions.

“What is your ideal, definition of what healthy means?” (Wait for their response, then probe / follow-up below)
“Where or who is that <so and so> definition comes from?” (Wait for their response, then continue follow-up below)
“Now, can you define, in your own words (Important!) ~ what does “healthy”, “fitness”, “average” or “normal” means to you, and only you, no-one else’s?

Take a deep breath, and ask them this pre-finale question.

“Now that you have defined what “healthy” is. Is this person you aspire to be? If yes, have you proven yourself?”

If they deflect, sideline or get distracted it’s probably a safe sign you have made your case (closed).

“Why can’t you be just like everyone else?”

Ask them back: “Why can’t you be yourself?”

Ask them when was the last time – they make a decision for themselves, by themselves. And finally – ask them if they’re “Happy”.

If not, try the following counter-responses and questions (to wake them up, hopefully):

“Are you really that desperate ~ to seek validation from everyone else, other than your own?”
“Are you really that desperate to ask everyone if you are okay?”
“What do you gain from all this approval? Will you be satisfied only for now, or will you be asking for more?”

If they counter-respond with “I have seen XYZ papers! I disagree and you should be ashamed” ~ it’s time for pre-conclusive remarks.

“I don’t think we’re going anywhere in this conversation. But here’s some questions for you to think about in your own time. Are you making a decision on behalf of everyone, or for your own self, for your own autonomy and for your own good?”
“Who or what are you trying to take control ~ everyone? The entire world? What about your own self?”

“Being healthy is just too expensive.”

Tell them there is a much more expensive “asset”, more than even the most precious of all metals gold, and/or rhodium combined. Their own life.

“I know everything is expensive. But what is more expensive, is your own life.”
“Do you really want to cheapen your own life?”
“Health is like investment. Money don’t grow on trees.”

If this discussion lingers on more than a few minutes, unfortunately it’s time for conclusive responses.

“I can defenitely relate to your’s (circumstance). I am doing my own best by experimenting what I can willingly sacrifice. I hope the same goes to you.”
“I know this conversation is rather tough on us both. But we can’t change reality that your time is finite. Maybe what’s best to “buy” for now is most probably not ~ that next iphone or that latest gadget.”
“I can defenitely relate. But I cannot spare a time for us here exchanging over who’s had it worse. Trust me, you would not feel any better if you are being compared to someone else.”

“I cannot exercise. <Insert excuse here>.”

“Regular brisk walking may also be more effective than running in preventing coronary disease. And just 30min of moderate activity a day more than three times/week significantly improves insulin sensitivity and helps reverse insulin resistance (ie, lowers the chronically elevated levels of insulin that are associated with obesity) within months in sedentary middle-aged adults.” Malhotra A et al. 2017

Nobody cares how much you lift. It’s probably less about how good you look, but more about how good you will live.

If nothing else matters or that nobody cares. Then the onus is on you, that you must care about yourself, selfishly, more than anyone who tells you otherwise.

Now, what if you are still being barked/accused that you are the one being judgemental? Try these remarks.

“You don’t need to change for the world. But you need raise your own expectations for what is best for you. Nobody can do that for you.”
“I don’t have any more to say nor than how it worthwhile it is at putting myself to the challenge. Maybe one day you will learn for yourself.”

What if ~ they’re still complaining about their own image. You can safely say to them:

“Go by what is “fine” ~ by your own terms. You don’t have to exercise at all then. So long as you are aware – by giving yourself consent that your life ~ is in your hands.”

And what if – they’re too self conscious during exercise? My advice, no matter how clumsy you look ~ close your eyes ~ as you do your exercise. Remember that your time in the gym is your own routine.

Lift intently, not intensely. Rest briefly. Time-under-tension. Mind-muscle-connection. Repeat.

“I don’t get all you conspiracy health nuts on all this <such-and-such fearmongering>.”

…”Sugar is bad”. “Insulin is bad.”. “Wifi is bad.” “EMF is bad”. “This/that is bad.” . “So what? What am I going to do? What do you WANT me to do? I can’t do anything! I am just one person!”.

A typical display towards Learned Helplessness.Try the following response/s.

“I am not expecting you to change for the world. Only you can change so much for what is you for you.
“Only you can give yourself expectations to be the best of yourself, in whatever life throws at you.”
“Congratulations, you are just one person. But you represent your own potential. Does that mean you are going to give up like everyone else? And stay like everyone else?”

Soon, they will likely ask for magic bullets. Cheapskates.

“Learn how to read food labels. Plenty of free information.”
“Learn how to read scientific papers. Again, plenty of free information.”
“Learn how to track your consumption / calories. Again, plenty of free information.”
“Keep yourself a journal somewhere that only you can keep, read and reflect on.”
“Set yourself some goals no matter how small, but Be Smart ~ Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant.“

And of all things ~ say firmly but politely – your exit statement/s. Many of these are what we’ve described above.

“Health is your own selfish pursuit. Get over what everyone is thinking.”
“You can believe in anything. But don’t overstay your welcome.”
“If everything-in-moderation works for you. Great. Provided you know exactly how you moderate Every. Little. Thing.”

Thank you.

Easier said than done ~ but an underlying message is “Ownership”. Whatever happens, nobody cares as much as you derive meaning from whatever you wish to keep for yourself, revise for yourself and reflect for yourself.

Every virtue spares a vice. And vice versa. That has been my own motto since the beginnings of this initiative.

Live-It-Forward,

AW.

Counter Arguments: for the Pedestrian Skeptics (Part 3)